Learning New Skills

I lost track with the blog for a little while, life has been busy.  In preparation for my upcoming training, I have been cooking mostly out of two cookbooks, The 30-Minute Vegan and The Taste of The East the last few weeks so I didn't feel I should be posting too many same chef's recipes.  It's just not good chef etiquette.

 Recently I spent three days training to teach plant based cooking with one of my favorite chefs and the author of these vegan cookbooks, Mark Reinfeld, of Vegan Fusion.  I am now in the third phase of the training.  I'll assist in a couple five and ten day classes and then give it a try on my own beginning with intimate demos in the local health food store, the produce store, and private homes.  I'd love to do a demo at the farmer's market using just the ingredients on hand there.  I'm a bit nervous, but excited to try out something new.  I always did love working in the restaurant business.  I enjoy helping people create their own meals and participate in their celebrations. This way, I can be a part of sharing wonderful food without the stress of trying to run a restaurant.  I like that idea. We'll see how it goes.  Not quitting the day job just yet. The training was great and I feel like I have the tools to begin exploring this adventure.

This month I'm assisting an experienced teacher with a three part class based on Dr. McDougall's plant based diet. Then towards the end of the month, I'm off to Portland to assist in a five day intensive training.  Looking forward to cooking with new friends.

First Demonstration:  Tomato Mung Bean Salad

 How to clean the seeds from a chili pepper without touching the seeds. 

I'm creating some great meals in my warm kitchen.  I have quite a few fun recipes to share, I'll be posting some shortly.

Photo Class at the Zoo

Attended a pretty intense photo class yesterday.  Half the day was at the Zoo learning how to capture the right light, motion, and effect.  We basically learned all the features of our camera and how to stay out of the auto button.  I can now do some things I didn't know how to do before.  I can actually shoot what I want to shoot.  I can zoom in on a subject and make the background fade out.  It's going to take some practice, a little daily studying, and some note taking for a bit to get comfortable with the things I learned yesterday. I am pretty excited to do the practicing though.  Hope you see some improvement in the photos posted. I am especially happy with the semi truck photo I took on the way home.  The truck is in clear view while the scenery around him is in motion. I can't believe I achieved that effect on purpose. To demonstrate capturing motion and stopping motion, we all lined up in two long lines and the instructors ran up and down between us letting us know what to do before they started running.  It was a really fun day.

Friends in the Garden

As I was picking beans last Saturday morning, a man came up behind me because he wanted to meet the person gardening behind his house. He would also like the corn stalks when I'm done for his friend's cows. Apparently it's a great treat for them. I know this man, his name is Steve. I haven't seen him in over a year and a half. He didn't recognize me at first as he is getting a bit old, 85 I think. When I told him my name and gave him a big hug, he remembered right away. His wife died last year and she was one of my closest friends.

Last year I experienced some emotional growth. That's what I'm calling it now anyway. It seemed that devastating news came about every two weeks. It began with learning my very dear friend would be dying from cancer. I felt privileged to be able to help her through it, but it was sad nonetheless and I miss her. I missed her terribly when life seemed a bit hopeless last year. Cheryl is the first person I thought of calling when things got tense. She'd have been at every court date she could, sitting next to me and reminding me things always work out. She'd remind me that things don't always work out the way we'd like, but they do work out. The sun usually comes out, in theory anyway, we do live in the Northwest.

One of the reasons we began the big garden was to work out some of the stress and tension we were under last year. It sure works, we also didn't realize how much we love the gardening. That's turned out to be a huge blessing that will hopefully continue for a long time. It's a very large community garden, surrounded by houses on either side. Turns out since Cheryl died, her husband Steve's eyesight has gotten weak and he can't drive. He's moved into town. He has been living directly behind my garden since last year. He says he comes out and looks around it every night. He loves our garden.

I felt comforted that someone I love has been there when we weren't. Sometimes when I'm working out there, I've had some conversations with Cheryl. I felt a little more like she has really been there. After he left I had a good cry. It was a grateful cry, kind of a cleansing cry. I love ya Cheryl, glad you are part of my life.

Cheryl Harman

Garden Update September

It was a slow start and we didn't get to give away as much vegetables as last year, but the garden is booming now.  We've harvested probably three loads just like this one this week.  It's been a busy week of washing, preparing, storing, and finding homes for our garden goodies.  It's been fun though.  I have lots put up for the winter.  I don't think I will be visiting a grocery store as much as I did last winter.  While canning my sauerkraut made from our garden cabbage this weekend, I realized that I am entertained by watching a canner simmer or fresh ice cream churning. Funny.

Dairy Free Mint Ice Cream

Dairy Free Mint Ice Cream with homemade Chocolate Sauce.

I just started going through the recipes in the Veg News food issue.  This is the first one I had to try.  I broke down and bought a little kitchen ice cream maker for the occasion.  I can see a lot of fun with this little gadget.

 
Raw cashews, coconut, agave, fresh mint from the garden, vanilla bean, and a dash of salt. The chocolate sauce is made with raw cocoa and agave with the seeds of a vanilla bean.

This ice cream received quite a few thumbs up from the fans at work.  They are getting a little less worried about trying the vegan treats I bring in.

Little Veggies

The garden is producing daily food now.  I am picking a pound of peas a day, three or four onions, and lots of herbs.  Yesterday I noticed there are little veggies popping up all over.

8 Ball Zucchini - It's about three inches in diameter.

Little Broccoli beginning

Up close

Sunburst Squash

Golden Zucchini beginning

Green Onion Griddle Cakes with Cool Gazpacho

I received some more recipes from The Flexitarian Cookbook coming out this fall to test.  They came at the right time for my weekend cooking adventures.  I made a few of the recipes for our meals this week.  Last night I tried the Green Onion Griddle Cakes with a Cool Gazpacho salad.  Our garden is starting to produce daily vegetables, I was able to use a lot of things we grew ourselves, like the onions, parsley, and nasturtiums for this meal.

Onion Potato Pancakes with Cool Gazpacho

This recipe is a different style of making potato pancakes than I have seen before.  It's a combination of mashed potatoes and raw grated potatoes.  I mixed it all in the food processor until it was a nice smooth consistency.  They came out really fluffy and flavorful.  The recipe called for creme fraiche, but I served them with plain soy yogurt.  This is a vegetarian meal as there is an egg in the batter.  The gazpacho is made with fresh tomatoes, cucumbers, avocado, fresh picked onions, garlic, chili oil, and balsamic vinegar.  The recipe directions were to blend it to the desired consistency.  It is supposed to be a soup, but my desired consistency this time was whole vegetables.


Yes, I eat the nasturtiums.  Nasturtiums are a watercress.

Watercress contains significant amounts of iron, calcium and folic acid, in addition to vitamins A and C.  Many benefits from eating watercress are claimed, such as that it acts as a stimulant, a source of phytochemicals and antioxidants, a diuretic, an expectorant and a digestive aid.  It also appears to have cancer-suppressing properties; it is widely believed to help defend against lung cancer.

The Garden's Having Some Fun Now

Summer's here and lovin' the weather, so's the garden.



I figured out, this slide show is nice with the music playing by the Secret Garden in my previous blog.

A letter to Barb

Things have been pretty quiet in our lives lately. Summer is here and we look forward to some music, camping, festivals, time with friends, gardening, and fresh food adventures.  I've been stuck for something to write about. Not much of a writer, but I still feel like I should have something to say and not just post a blog because I feel like I should. I was writing a letter to my friend and sister, Barb, this morning and realized it would make a good post as it sums up life pretty well.

Barb and I have been friends and sisters since we were 14 or 15.  We dreamed of our own home together in high school and we did have that home together, a couple times.  Love you Barb!

Deb & Barb 1979

 
Hi Barb,

I haven't been very sociable this year. The deal with Marty really broke our hearts. I have been dealing with a different kind of pain like I have never known. Two evenings with this young lady and so far he has plead guilty to 'rape of a child' in two counties, I think three counts. He is facing two more right now. FOR THE SAME NIGHT! He's been in a jail or prison for a year and a half now. This is the fifth jail he is in right now.

He finished his prison term for WA last month and was transported directly to St. Helen's Oregon to face another two charges for the same fucking incident. You see you have to drive through Columbia County to get to Astoria where he was first convicted. Apparently they might have stopped at the beach near the river on the way. He is getting charged now for what we might call the "pre-game." But, whatever happened, it happened on the way to the main event in Astoria and the charges he already plead guilty to now count as prior offenses. So, two nights, something like five counts of some form of rape in three counties, two states. He is facing 14 years in prison in Oregon. If he is found guilty of the charges in Oregon he would be sentenced to 14 years without the chance of parole.  And, this is his first offense, I don't understand this.  If he had robbed a liquor store, he'd be completing his probation by now.

Scott and I stick pretty close to each other these days. We have pulled together like a couple that has been together 25 years should.  We have had a few bumps along the way, but for the most part, we've been good to each other through this.

We have a great garden, 40' x 40'. It's in a community garden plot where there are 120 gardens. It's an awesome place. We put lots of our energy into that. Last year we gave away food to almost everyone we know. I dropped off lots at churches, AA halls, and brought veggies to both our jobs. I can't believe how much we love it. We first started the big garden last year during this ordeal. Someone said gardening would relieve stress and I thought we could try it. They were right, I can go two, sometimes three, hours without thinking about Marty and Bob.

Anyway, we do get into pictures a lot. Since Marty has been in so many places, we go see him every other weekend, we see a lot of the countryside. The prisons were both a four hour drive, roundtrip. We make sure to stop along the way to hike, take photos, and try to turn it into an enjoyable trip. We've been to see him in three jails and two prisons. Unfortunately I know the difference between a good visiting area and a bad one. We have been searched numerous times and gone through some interesting and humiliating procedures. Oh, he can't live here when he gets out either because we are too close to a school. Fuck, he didn't rape anyone, he had consensual sex with a young lady who called our house and asked him out. I dunno, time to buy a small farm I think. We do need a business. I want to retire in six years, but I know I will still need to work.

Pisses me off, I live my life sober and honestly, Scott & I don't do harm to anyone and live a pretty quiet life. We have a happy loving relationship. Sometimes I just don't understand how it could go so wrong so quickly. I still have a hard time believing this is happening.

Bob is in Afghanistan. He communicates on facebook now & then. He says there is more fighting going on then when he went to Iraq. Some stories he probably shouldn't be telling his mother. He sent some interesting pictures of his unit going through farms picking vegetables. Or, I thought they were vegetables. I posted the pictures on my blog and later when he called asked him what he was picking. He said, mom, look closer, those are huge Oregano? plants. Oh, duh, guess I have pictures of huge pot growing in vegetable fields and I didn't even know it. Yeah, I'm an old fart now I guess.

So, I am still me, just a bit quieter, bitchier, and sometimes down right pissy. But, I still love you. I am looking forward to your son's wedding, whenever it may be. It will give us a good excuse to come play in the bay area. We like that.

Here's a link to our pictures we take, Our pictures. There is a folder called "Garden 2010." We are really happy with gardening. I think we will probably get a run down farm in the future and go back to living in the country, I'm ready. After all, we moved into town for the kids years ago, they aren't here anymore.


Enjoying the sunshine tremendously, it's been in the 90ºs, we had no spring! Get to go get my granddaughter next weekend and play with her for a couple weeks. I am going to start the adventure with a trip to Sequim for the Lavender festival.  She's big enough to go visit the farms with me and make some lavender crafts herself.  I am very excited about that.

Love you, Deb

Balance? in Juneuary?

Yes, it's Juneuary in the Northwest.  I feel like we've seen enough rain to last us until next winter.  We are still wearing sweaters, socks, and long pants to work in mid June.  We have had some sunshine about once a week.  They say this is the longest stretch of rainy weather in spring in 23 years.  I had so hoped to be in my garden more.   The plants are growing, but they are small.  The biggest thing I miss though is the peace I get when I'm out there.

Marty is soon to be released from the prison in Washington and will be transported to another jail in Oregon where he can once again face charges for the same instance and same people.    He has been incarcerated now for the last year and a half.   I fear he has quite a few months or more ahead of him left.  I have seen many courtrooms in the last year and a half, many people who have done much worse have gotten less trouble, from my standpoint anyway.   I don't understand our justice system at all.   I still have problems believing this has happened at all.   I do know what surreal feels like.   We are responsible people, things like this aren't supposed to happen, at least I didn't think so.   I am trying to handle all of this better than I did last year.   This week I am back to screaming inside a bit.  But, I know there are many blessings in my life.   I just have to learn to see them and remember them when I feel bad.

Yesterday I sent my first care package to my son in Afghanistan.  He asked for canned meats and easy meals, the just add water kind, socks, coffee, and foot powder.   They get some vegetables and fruit from local farmers.   Oh my gosh, I filled a box with what I consider "edible food-like substances."   I tried to keep it a little healthy by sending canned salmon, crab, papaya, and applesauce along with the Spam and other cans that had pictures of meat.   But most of the things he asked for I wouldn't buy or eat, but I'm not the one foraging for food in unfriendly places.    He can have what he wants, if I can send it.  He sent me a picture of his cooking facilities and some of their "gardening."  I am pretty sure I wouldn't  like it if these guys came by my garden dressed for battle with loaded rifles. 

Bob's Kitchen

Picking vegetables

And, Fruit shopping, I think this is the closest my sailor gets to water.

The man who helped me at the post office was a jolly character.  He showed me how to fill out the custom papers and handed me a stack of them for the future boxes.   He gave me a whole roll of postal packing tape, and a stack of boxes marked for sending to FPO addresses.  He also went on to proudly tell me about his daughter who just made 3rd class in the Navy, she's deployed, and a son who is about to enter Officer Training School.   Then, he said something that made me feel connected to him and a little relaxed inside, he said his other son was in prison, he had made a stupid decision.  You know that made me smile inside to hear someone else say the same thing I do.  I know how this man feels. He was kind sharing with me even though he was probably just letting it out like I do.   It seems to help to tell others.   If I felt alone yesterday, as I often do in this ordeal, I didn't for that moment.   I thanked him for sharing and told him my other son was also in prison.  He said, "you know, we all have one."   I am so glad I picked that moment to go to the post office, I haven't felt that connected to a stranger like that in a long time.  Somehow that eased the pain just a bit. 

So, yes, I have whined a bit today and I'm not feeling that great.  But at the same time I am able to see that there is some balance to all of this.   Even if I only see a little, I know that I do learn from the trials I go through.  Gosh, if I don't remember this, my friends, the books I read, and the music I listen to remind me of this all the time.   I shouldn't forget it, but I do.  I am learning to appreciate what I do have and not worry about what I don't have.  I can feel the peace when it comes.  I do have a good life, I'm alive, sober, happily married, employed at a job I love, and there are lots of vegetables growing in my garden soon, if the darn sun would shine.

We do try to find a way to make some fun along this journey.  We took a long time to drive home Sunday from visiting Marty in Aberdeen.  We got so wrapped up in catching the beauty of the sunshine and the coast, on the same day, it took us four hours to drive home.  It should only take two and that's with a stretch stop or two.

As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.

Carl Jung, "Memories, Dreams, Reflections", 1962

The Song of Wandering Aengus

I WENT out to the hazel wood,

Because a fire was in my head,

And cut and peeled a hazel wand,

And hooked a berry to a thread;

And when white moths were on the wing,

And moth-like stars were flickering out,

I dropped the berry in a stream

And caught a little silver trout.

When I had laid it on the floor

I went to blow the fire a-flame,

But something rustled on the floor,

And someone called me by my name:

It had become a glimmering girl

With apple blossom in her hair

Who called me by my name and ran

And faded through the brightening air.

Though I am old with wandering

Through hollow lands and hilly lands,

I will find out where she has gone,

And kiss her lips and take her hands;

And walk among long dappled grass,

And pluck till time and times are done,

The silver apples of the moon,

The golden apples of the sun. 

W.B. Yeats (1865–1939). The Wind Among the Reeds. 1899.

Organic Farm Tour

Last Sunday we had a delightful tour of three organic farms sponsored by People's Coop, Alberta Grocery Coop, and Food Front in Portland.  There were about 100 of us on this little field trip, pun intended.  I try to stop in at People's most trips to Portland.   I have been to the Alberta Coop, but not Food Front.  I'll have to visit now that I know they are there, I think they have two stores. 

I love shopping and being a member of the Coop.  I know I am getting the best organic whole food as local as possible.  Being a member I feel like I am contributing to a good thing.  The produce section in People's is beautiful even in the winter.  There are many whole ingredients I used to prepare our meals that are either very hard to get in our little community or are more expensive here.  For example, I can get all the loose teas and herbs I need in bulk so I can buy a little or a lot.  Vanilla beans are usually below $2 a piece.  To buy them here, they are packaged in little glass tubes and become $6 a piece, even at the best whole foods store in town. 

They have me pretty spoiled too.  I went to one of those big box stores with my friend.  I won't even go in their produce cooler, it's all mass manufactured, tasteless, chemical ridden food like substance.   Anyway, I noticed a big bag of organic raw almonds.  We use lots of raw almonds.  I thought to myself, yes, they are a bit cheaper than I pay, but even if they are grown organically and perhaps even in a sustainable farm, I don't think the almonds on the bottom of the bag or even half way down are going to be as fresh as they should be once we get to them.  Nope, I like shopping the bulk food way.  Less packaging, I can buy in any amount I need or my wallet allows, and I know what I am getting.

This is a annual trip for members to give us more of a connection with where our food comes from and who the people are that grow it for us.  Even though it was a rainy spring Sunday, it was a great trip and quite educational.  There were three different farms on our journey, the first was more like a research facility and farm run by a retired college professor, the second a cider house and vineyard, and the third a 100 acre organic vegetable farm.  It was like a very very large garden.  It was great to get to meet the people who grow our food and get a sense of what they are about too.

Our first stop was to Sunbow Farm in Corvalis, OR, an organic farm since 1972.  We learned about composting and care of the soil to sustain future crops and protect the earth.  Harry MacCormack is the co-founder of Oregon Tilth.  Oregon Tilth is a nonprofit research and education membership organization dedicated to biologically sound and socially equitable agriculture.  He was happy to tell us of his research with composte, composte tea, and farming while taking care of the soil to keep it resilient.  He is a character, a retired professor and writer, and he's got quite a history.   He's a poet too.  He started the farmer's market at People's and has had a hand in helping others get started.   This farm very much reminded me of The Farm, in Summertown, TN, that I had the opportunity to visit in April.

We had a great vegan lunch prepared by Abbys Table at Wandering Aengus in Salem, OR.  There was a very tasty raw "tuna" salad - a salad of sprouted seeds and nuts with flavors of the sea, lentil salad with parsley and mint.  I am going to try to recreate this salad very soon.  There was a build your own sandwich buffet of great salads, marinated tempeh, roasted tofu, whole grain breads and much more.  It was nice to be with 100 people who didn't mind that lunch was vegan.  I didn't get a picture of lunch, which is surprising, I think I was probably to busy eating anxious to wander around the orchards and vineyards.  There was also some wine and cider tasting.  You have to ask someone else how that was, I don't drink so I didn't partake.   I did however, listen to the trials and tribulations of growing enough good apples to brew the cider.  This was a very pleasant and relaxing stop on our journey.

Wandering Aengus

Our last farm of the day was Mustard Seed Farms in St. Paul, OR.  This looked like a huge garden in my mind.  This farmer produces greens and veggies to coops, wholesalers, and the local community.  He has a different kind of community garden.  Instead of dividing up into plots, he invites the community to come help on the farm for a number of hours each week to contribute to the garden for their seasonal vegetables . 

Rainy Day with Occasional Sunshowers

It's a rainy day with occasional sunshowers.  It'll make our drive to see Marty so much more fun. We should see a few rainbows along the way.  We'll take some home with us in our cameras.  It's Saturday afternoon and already almost a full day for me.  I was up early, as usual, went to a meeting at 6:00 a.m., grabbed some inspiration, and then up to my friend's house to do some work.  I was home by noon and since I got the salad started last night it didn't take too long to finish.  Scott will be home soon and we're off to see Marty in Aberdeen.  That will take up the rest of the day.  We do make it a point to stop along the way and enjoy our surroundings for a little while.  At least it's a very beautiful drive.  I am ready though, salad is made, we have some packed and ready to eat in the woods somewhere today, and I made a pot of white beans before I went to bed last night.  Since today is pretty much taken up, I had to make sure we had out basics in the fridge before today.

Last night though, we did have to shop. Looks like there's lots of room in this refrigerator. 

Just 20 minutes in the produce section, we have meals for a week.

Didn't forget the fruit.

I am pleased at how much fruit and vegetables go through my kitchen each week.  We really have taken on some healthy habits when it comes to eating.  I don't think there are but two or three items in my refrigerator that are processed food.  The ones that are, are vegan.

I received five recipes from The Flexitarian Cookbook in my email box yesterday.  The message said "Here are some recipes to keep you busy until the book is published in August."  I think they'll keep me busy an hour or two.  I am hoping to fit a couple of them in this weekend, tomorrow.  One of the recipes has peanut butter, granola, chocolate, and coconut.  Gotta try that one. :-)  Another is made with chickpeas, sweet onions, and pomegranate seeds.  Looks fun, but pomegranates aren't in season right now so I will have to be creative.  I am going to soak some coarse chopped, dried blueberries and cranberries and soak them in a little bit of pomegranate juice.  Sounds adventurous, but I bet it will work out just fine.  I'll let you know.

Tomorrow the weather is supposed to be like it is today, with a few more sun showers. I hope so.  I would like to get some more seedlings in the ground and just be outside.  We went out to take a peak in the rain last night. Things are looking beautiful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

After Great Pain......

After Great Pain, a Formal Feeling Comes

Emily Dickinson

After great pain, a formal feeling comes
The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Tombs
The stiff Heart questions was it He, that bore,
And Yesterday, or Centuries before?

The Feet, mechanical, go round
Of Ground, or Air, or Ought
A Wooden way
Regardless grown,
A Quartz contentment, like a stone

This is the Hour of Lead
Remembered, if outlived,
As Freezing persons recollect the Snow
First-Chill-then Stupor-then the letting go

Home & Peace - The Gardens

I am a lucky and grateful woman. I know there is a lot of love in my life. I've done some traveling, bonding, loving, laughing, and even a little crying. I've put a few traveling miles on my body and heart. My sister, my niece, and I meandered through four states together in a few days. A couple of those states we went to twice. We spent at least 700 miles in a car together this last week. We shared a lot of love and saw many wonderful sites. It was a memorable experience but, I am whirling emotionally and physically today. In a good way though, my sister and I get closer to understanding each other every time we see each other. It's not always easy, we have some different opinions about life, as we should. We've lived on different sides of the country for so many years and traveled different paths. This is a learning process. One of my most favorite parts of the experience was getting to know my niece, Stephanie. I didn't get to be with my nieces and nephews when they were children growing up and I feel like I am close with one of them now. I hope we continue joining each others journey from time to time and with less time in between.

I need to rest and be calm and creative. I am glad I don't have to work until Monday. I have a beautiful weekend to relax and decompress from such a long trip. I am so grateful for my life and home. There is so much love and beauty around without going to far to look for it. The sun is shining and I am breathing in the beautiful gardens around us. I just have to walk around my house and yard to find calming beauty. It doesn't take long for me to feel the healing. I noticed I was dancing in the kitchen to some great music this morning. I am going to spend the weekend quiet and calm. A quick run to the farmer's market and the produce stand and our off-site garden are all I want to see this weekend other than my warm home. A bit of turning on the tunes and creating in the kitchen is in order too.

Just a short walk around my home and breathing in all the colorful beauty popping up in the sunshine warmed my heart pretty quickly. The plants in the greenhouses are getting ready for outdoors. My friends gave me "time" for my birthday this year. My husband and Bill repaired the front door which was years overdo. Scott planted the corn starts on my birthday. Rachel worked to find my backyard again. I have not seen my steps in the backyard for a long time. I do remember standing at the top of them last year with a broken leg sad because I couldn't use them. I think I kind of forgot about them. What a wonderful birthday present. Thank you Scott, Bill, & Rachel!

Walk in Love

There is a lot of love in my life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Life is Like

stepping into a boat

which is about to sail

out to sea and sink."

Suzuki Roshe

Tuesday

Up before the sun as usual and praying my attitude stays positive. My favorite week at work, the last week of the month and most is wrapping up the month and preparing for the crunch of month end and preparing the financial reports.

I need to start my exercise regularly. I was on such a good run with a personal goal of 300 minutes a week last year. I reached that goal a couple of times, averaging about 240 minutes a week. I lost 30 lb, but broke my ankle and that interrupted the nice roll I was on. Haven't gained any weight, even over the holidays, but haven't lost any either. That is due to the fact that I eat a 90% plant based diet. I let breaking my ankle be the excuse for not keeping it up. Well, the ankle is healing and there is no excuse. It worked nicely last year tracking my exercise minutes, I will try that again. My favorite is swimming, but the high school pool changed hours so it is inconvenient for me. I am thinking of checking out the Y. I know it's expensive, but swimming I WILL do. I do know that if it helps nothing else, exercise does help maintain a good attitude within.

My husband and I are working very hard at communication and sharing our hearts. We learned so very much about some of these things this year and how important they are.

" Love that does not renew itself every day becomes a habit and in turn a slavery"

Kahlil Gibran

And I Begin

I have never been to a prison and never went to visit anyone. This was my reality yesterday. What I feared for the last year, beginning last January actually happened. I never in my wildest dreams ever imagined my son in prison. He is a good person, a smart, polite, and thoughtful young man. He made a bad decision and this is where he lives for the next year. This has affected mine and my husband's life more than I could have ever known.

I would like this blog to be focused on my love for cooking and the quest for the interesting and healthy cuisine. I have been studying and learning about vegetarian and vegan life styles. I love to cook, but also want to avoid many of the diseases my family has suffered. I want to share books, links, and articles about healthy sustainable living. I care about the environment and want to learn more about how to do my part to help the cause. I am interested in gardening, we have learned to garden and grow much of our own food in the summer. I participate in a CSA and am very enthusiastic about the "Farm to Table Movement." I am somewhat of an artist, mostly a crafty woman and open to many styles of art and music.

But, as the title suggests, I am a bit eclectic and this blog will be eclectic. I hope I will be able to see some personal growth during the next year by writing about my thoughts as I go through the pain of seeing my son in an orange jumpsuit behind bars and more bars and barb wire. Since the very first moment we knew he was charged with a serious crime I have experienced anger, fear, and resentment like never before. Sometimes I handled it well, sometimes I didn't. During the ordeal of all the courtrooms, jails, attorneys, etc., and many of the other experiences with our "Just Us" system, I couldn't see that anything good would ever come of this. I feared for my relationship with my husband as many couples don't survive pain and tragedy like this. It definitely brought us closer, we came together as a couple who've been together for 24 years should. We had some upsets along the way, but we are getting through this together. We have learned to talk more and share our feelings and thoughts more. We will get through this as stronger people and I am beginning to understand and believe this.

I have been reminded that we cannot appreciate the calm without a storm. The storm is still rolling, but I am learning to handle it in different ways. Because the only thing I can control is how I handle a situation.

I am someone who prays the serenity prayer every day:

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can and
the wisdom to know the difference.