February 2, 2010

Trials & Gifts

Still reeling from Sunday's visit. Nice to see my son, but I will probably feel pretty weird no matter how well the visit goes. We are pretty quiet as we drive down the road from our visit. I am still in disbelief that he's really in prison and that any of this ever happened at all. I get through each day a little better, but I don't go a day without thinking about how much I wish I could help my son. I do miss him. I am trying to accept what has been placed in front of us as not to get angry over something I have no control over. The best thing and the only thing I can do is to take care of myself and keep going forward. My attitude and how I deal with life's trials and gifts are the only things I can control. I don't want to cause any more damage or pain mentally, physically, or spiritually to myself or anyone else. That is what is most important on my end. I also need to be aware of the many gifts I DO receive daily. There is a lot of love in my life.

Taking the long drive to visit him does cause us to spend a day driving the countryside and enjoy a little of life together. There isn't much city on our two hour drive each way, it's very peaceful. There are great places to stop and take photos. We just pull over whenever my husband gets a picture in his view, which is often. He loves playing with his camera and I am so glad he does. I am getting better at taking photos too. We have found some of the most beautiful places just randomly stopping, getting out of the car, and walking into the woods just a short distance.

Oyster Bay, WA

We drove home the slow route, along old highway 99. We've been wanting to do that for years. We had to take a couple of unexpected and welcome detours along the way too. Sometimes getting lost is a good way to find the places we are looking for. We meandered through the country enjoying the calm and the scenery. It was so much better than the usual straight run down I5. We stopped at a very remote country restaurant. Along the highway in the middle of a very very small town was a huge old farmhouse turned into a restaurant. This place was like eating my grandmother's house. It's full of antiques and dusty bookshelves with too many old glass ornaments. The menu wasn't very vegetarian friendly, but it was old fashioned family Sunday dinner food, chicken and dumplings, pork chops, chicken livers, homemade pie and ice cream, etc. Even though I wouldn't eat most of what was on the menu anymore I could tell that the food was made with love  and care. It was a pretty special place. We had salads, vegetable soup, and shared some homemade marionberry  ice cream and enjoyed the atmosphere. 

I know the day was calming because I slept all night. I am usually up around 4:30, if not earlier. Monday I woke up at 6:50 a.m. That doesn't happen very often.

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